Care leavers’ transitions to independence

Especially because at the time I was on co-dydramol for my hypermobility, so I was in a difficult position because the young people knew, a couple of them knew, that I was on pain medication, and had been in my room, so had seen that I was on co-dydramol. So I actually had young people asking me to sell them my co-dydramol – never did – but they would ask me. And it made me feel really unsafe, because then I needed to make sure that my room was always locked and that I didn’t ever accidently leave my medication in the kitchen, or something.—

Yeah.

And the staff never... there was never anything in place with that, you know? And like, yeah, co-dydramol’s not a controlled substance, but still the staff never put any safely plans in place for how to manage my safety knowing that I had a medication that young people ...

But yeah, though they never factored in the fact that I had medication that young people on drugs would often seek out. There was a young person that told me in detail how he could use my medication to make [a drug], so it was just like: “Yeah, no, I’m not giving you my medication, dude – I need it.” So, it was things like that were just... were never dealt with very well, and there was no safeguarding in place to make sure that I was safe in that situation, and that the young people who were on drugs were safe as well. It was a very interesting situation. There was a lot of young people coming through with a lot of like significant drug issues, and there was one young person that actually got moved to a rehab facility and things. It was... it was chaos, it was absolute chaos. At one point there was a young person that took a bat to another young person’s door because they had stolen a PlayStation and things; it was insane.

So, for me, before I was in care, I was in the exact same area as I was in care. So basically, when I left care, I only went around 20 minutes down the road to a different area of [County], but was still in the same county. So, for me, I was in a different area for 12 weeks, like, but then I ended up moving back to the area where my... where my rela... where my family was who I lived with prior to care. So, it was... it was quite traumatic and quite shocking that the system works like that, because in my situation, I went through court proceedings for a family member, my parent, who was physically... like, who caused me physical harm; he is an extremely not a nice person. So, for me, being in the exact same area when I turned 18, I literally moved straight back to that area at 18, straight back to an area where this guy lives. Literally, I was 10 minutes down the road from where he was – 10 minutes down a road. Shopped in the same place because that’s what you have to do. Like, where I... I lived was literally a very small place, so wherever you live in the district, you have to shop in the same place as everybody. You have to do everything in the same place, otherwise you just wouldn’t leave your house. How would you do your shopping? So, it meant that I literally saw him on a daily basis: it caused me severe anxiety, heightened my mental health to the worst possible thing ever.

It’s quiet. The neighbours are really nice, that this area’s really nice, and this is meant to be an area that’s rough, huh, which shocks me because it’s not. This is the ‘lower section’ they call it here, so there’s like two different sections of this area that I’m living in, and this is the lower one, and the other side’s the upper, but I’ve had no issues here the whole time I’ve been here; it’s quiet. I’ve got a lovely view outside of there, and yeah, I’ve got a nice big kitchen, so I can cook and make food, and I love it; it’s perfect.

And so after that, I was then... they were, like, looking for, like, a place in, like, supported accommodation because I couldn’t, like, live by myself yet. And then I moved from the children’s home to, like, a supported accommodation, which was like a children’s home, but much smaller, and there was only three of us, and it was for people between the age of, like, 16 and 25, I think. It was like very specific support.

And they’ve got a number of houses, like the company had loads of different houses. And then I was there as I was kind of turning, like, 18, 19. And I did get more support there from the staff, but I never felt like I had loads of support from, like, social services themselves; they were kind of always a bit in the background.

So, the support they gave me wasn’t really useful, it was kind of, just, it were financial advice I needed to apply for benefits. Other than that, obviously I am grateful for the support they gave me, but I didn’t really find it useful. So, it kind of felt like I was living alone, wasn’t much support. What I really needed was that emotional support. I think that was the most difficult aspect of completely being alone once you sort of lost that family support. Lost that care support and no sort of structure in place. So, yeah.

Yeah, I think they literally chose the first place that they could get a referral through to within the space of a few weeks, in all honesty. I went to visit somewhere else which was basically all over 55 and I was like: “Guys, I don’t think this is the kinda supported accommodation we’re looking for, ’cause, you know, I’m a young person not struggling to walk, or anything, I just need the emotional support.” So then when they like... I think the basis of getting me supported accommodation was unfortunately my autism not my mental health, so where I went was specialised in learning difficulties, and then I got there and they were like: “Yeah, you really don’t need this kind of support.”

Because I like... the first placement he tried to put me in was, like, I was the youngest person by, like, 50 years and I just point-blank refused. I was like: “That is not happening.” [chuckles] And then the second one was that, and I didn’t realise it that until I moved in.

Oh, so you didn’t get to see it?

I visited but the house was empty when I visited, as in none of the other residents were home because they were on activities or, at, like, educational wherever. So, when I went, I didn’t, process the fact that it was based on my autism that I’d got the place, and they were all really sweet and I was like: ‘OK, this... they’re being a bit cringe, but it’s probably because I’m new.’

And then over time it kind of clicked in my brain, I was like: ‘erm, yeah, OK, I don’t need that kinda support. I know how to cook and clean and do the basics, guys.’

Oh, OK, so you didn’t have the context until you actually moved in? I see, OK.

And then, I obviously didn’t require the support, so I wouldn’t really access it, I’d be like in and out and doing my own thing all day, so they reduced my hours and then handed in notice and was like: ‘yeah; yeah, you’re good.’

I was in a really bad place, and, to be honest, the entire time I’ve kind of had support from my PA, like, she’s been really great, and she’s been... you know, when it comes to stuff like financial concerns, or needing a gift card for getting food, or sort of... I know… she just helps out, you know, it’s been really positive, and I think that’s... you know, I’ve kind of had to be very independent and very, very quickly, very, very young, so... and I’ve not had much support around me. So, the only consistent pieces of support has been the woman I was with, who’s absolutely great, and I still talk to her all the time now, and my PA. So, they’ve been the one... the two consistent... Like, they helped me get into uni also, like, you know doing the whole... what do you call it, prepping for an interview, and you gotta do on your, your forms to, if I’m stuck on... oh no, I got billed council tax, but I’m a care leaver, what do I do? They sorted it all out, and they’ve just helped me, really.

So, from 17 I had a leaving care team worker as I transitioned from care, child in care to care leaver, and I started to get to know her. She supported me whilst I was out of area, and then she supported me into my house, worked alongside my social worker. She helped me decorate, and she helped me spend my grant on things for the property. She would check in on a weekly basis. I’ve actually got a really good relationship with her. So, I speak to her now even though she’s not a leaving care team worker. I received quite a bit of support from the local leaving care team. To the point where I currently still work with them in a care leaver support forum. 

The second place, actually, was very nice, ’cause I stayed there for a whole year in that place, especially for almost... or let’s say, more than 10 months I lived alone in that house. It’s a two-bedroom flat, but one bedroom is closed; my bedroom and the whole house was for me, alone. I loved that house, I loved it so much, I used to say that is my house. I kept it clean; I don’t need anyone to come and clean my house. They usually have staff that come in and clean it every month, and every month or two, I’m not sure, but... When she always comes, she says that I made her job easy, I made her life easy, ’cause already my house is clean; I don’t struggle with those things.