Clare first started to notice that her aunt had memory issues when her aunt began to struggle to remember words. They would have conversations, and her aunt would say “I can’t find the right word. What was that word again?” and become very anxious. This began to happen more and more, and when Clare reassured her by saying that she also sometimes forgets words, she realised her aunt had forgotten what Clare was reassuring her about. Clare realised there was a big problem when her aunt was meant to be staying with her and arrived a day early without notice. When they checked her aunt’s diary, she had correctly written the time and date but still arrived at the wrong time. This behaviour was often coupled with her aunt feeling very anxious.

After this incident, Clare became more involved in her aunt’s care, and while she is one of her aunt’s only living next of kin, her aunt already had people as her Power of Attorney. Clare began to look into who they were as she suspected her aunt had dementia and knew from an experience with her neighbour they needed to be contacted. Clare has found it very difficult to care for her aunt because her aunt will not go to the GP or acknowledge there is an issue. Also, since Clare does not have Power of Attorney, trying to find support for her aunt has been frustrating. Neither of the people her aunt chose to have Power of Attorney live nearby, so Clare has been trying to navigate her aunt’s care with them.

Clare has also sought advice from a dementia charity and friends whose parents have had dementia to help her navigate her aunt’s care. However, Clare has found trying to discuss things with her aunt is awkward because she is her elder and Clare is not her Power of Attorney. Therefore, Clare is unable to make any decisions about her aunt’s care.