Gordon
Gordon’s wife self-funded care from age 79
Over the past ten years, Gordon has been managing his wife’s care needs. He has occasional help from a carer who has experience of working with people with dementia but, in the main, pays for help with the household while carrying out personal care himself.
Gordon, aged 76, is a retired head of a banking organisation. He and his wife have been married for 20 years and have five adult children from previous marriages. His wife, aged 83, was born and educated in the USA and worked as a head of IT.
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Gordon feels that it is important to encourage his wife to maintain her abilities to do things for herself as far as possible and also to keep healthy with walks in the garden. For this reason, Gordon largely carries out his wife’s care himself while paying for help with household tasks such as gardening, cleaning and ironing. Gordon is a local councillor and two or three times a week employs a woman to care for his wife when he goes out to meetings and occasionally friends will help out with short visits. It is very important to Gordon for his wife to keep her independence and freedom so it is essential that anyone helping with her care understands this approach. Gordon had looked into using a local care agency but this did not seem flexible enough, also he preferred to have the services of one person who would get to know his wife. Gordon has also found it useful to have cameras around the house which he can check on his phone or iPad – this allows Gordon to see that his wife is safe while she has the choice to move about as she wishes. Gordon would recommend anyone to consider the technology available to help people living with dementia remain safe at home.
Gordon and his wife receive Attendance Allowance as well as a reduction on council tax. They both have very good pensions and, though they are careful, are not concerned about the cost of care and support. Gordon holds Lasting Power of Attorney for health and finance for his wife, along with her two sons. He feels it is important to talk to family about plans, for example, if Gordon should die before his wife he expects that her sons would make arrangements for her to continue to be well cared for at home.
Gordon had thought about the possibilities of future care for his wife.
Gordon had thought about the possibilities of future care for his wife.
I obviously I’ve got to manage my money carefully because we’ve got to make it last out as long as Joan and I are here, and then the kids want some of it but and then, and Joan’s health, I mean no-one knows how to cure Alzheimer’s, and I’ve done a lot of reading on the subject and I do what I think is right for Joan
I think that question, as you say, of you don’t know what’s going to happen in the next decade, that makes it difficult to sort of predict and manage for doesn’t it?
Well if, well if I die then Joan’s sons would make sure that she’s all right and I’ve made it clear to them I would like Joan to be able to stay in this house and have somebody to look after her. So that’s what I would like to see happen that’s if well that’s, that’s a real problem; if I die, if Joan gets worse then what if she does get worse what does that mean?
Gordon felt it was important to have a care worker who is familiar and constant.
Gordon felt it was important to have a care worker who is familiar and constant.
I looked into a, a company who provides care for people in their houses but after a bit of research; the key thing I think is to try and get someone that [a] you know and trust and [b] that they, that could be constant, so you don’t want any chopping and changing. So the lady I found was a, I know that she only lives in [name of town] and it’s very easy for her to come here and she doesn’t need to work full-time and so that, and she was well qualified. So in a sense I was lucky in being able to do that.
Gordon and his wife had a solicitor draw up LPAs for both finance and health and welfare.
Gordon and his wife had a solicitor draw up LPAs for both finance and health and welfare.
I think you said you have Power of Attorney?
Yes.
Is it just you that has Power of Attorney or do any of your children have?
My, no, Joan’s son’s also got Power of Attorney so that if anything happens to me then he’ll have Power of Attorney over health and money, yeah.
So what, and what advice did you get and what led you to decide to do that?
Well I’m quite knowledgeable about things and I knew that I had to get a Power of Attorney if something happened to Joan sorry, if something happens, yeah, if something happens to Joan or something happens to me.
So it was just something that’s always been on your, you’ve always sort of known about the existence of that kind of thing and…?
Well you, you see plenty of writing about it in the newspapers and all of that so it’s the common-sense thing to do.
So when was that put in place?
Oh I can’t remember the date; it must be about four or five years ago anyway.
So did that did that take much doing, was it…?
No, no, you’ve just got to employ a lawyer [laughs].